Do you keep momentos of past loves?

I live in an apartment building, and while the walls are thick enough most of the time, tonight I overheard a lot of yelling and even some smashing of items in the next apartment. I turned down the tv and listened in - at first because it sounded so scary I was concerned about someone getting hurt, but eventually because it was a pretty juicy conversation.

It seems that the couple next door has only been living together the past few months, and yesterday he discovered a few momentos she has kept from a previous relationship, including a sex tape of her with her last boyfriend. I did not infer this; he stated those exact words.

His perspective is that she brought this and other remnants into their home, effectively polluting it with the past. Hers is that she had a life before she met him and should be allowed to retain her memories.

I can see both sides of this story. I was with a man for two and a half years before I met my partner, and that former love and I still talk from time to time by phone. While I no longer have the more ... scandalous souveniers, I have the innocent photos (some even displayed in frames) and gifts he gave me. Even a blanket his mom crocheted for me.

But will I bring these things along with me when I'm married? No, I won't put up framed photos of my ex or spread that blanket on the sofa. But what will I do with them? Throwing them away seems honestly like throwing away my history, all the good memories and everything I learned from that previous relationship. I don't wish those thing undone, and I don't want to have to strip myself of the momentos of that period in my life.

I don't plan on throwing away these things. I can imagine someday being ready to get rid of them, but I can also imagine showing those happy photographs to my children and telling them that I had loved someone before I met their dad, and that maturity means creating a balance and learning from your past. I will probably transfer those momentos to my parents' home when I am married, and when my parents no longer live there, to a trunk in my attic.

And yet how would I feel if I found photographs of Andrew's exes amongst his things, in our home? As long as they stay put away, I like to think that I'd be okay with it. I like to think I'd be mature. I like to think that he, too, is capable of treasuring his past without wanting to return to it.

But a sex tape? As in, an actual piece of videography documenting his physical ecstasy with another woman? Nope. Not okay. I don't think I'd be so open to his treasuring those memories - even though I know he doesn't want to return to that.

So do you keep momentos of your past relationships? Does your partner? And how would you react to finding them if you didn't know they were there?